Change ………….. stepping out of our comfort zone……

“Those who refuse discipline
despise themselves,
but those who listen to correction
gain understanding.”    Prov. 15:32 CEB

Over the next few days I will be writing about some of the ways we avoid or resist change.  It is understandable that change can cause pain but changing is a natural process which enables us to grow, and growing is a completely natural process that we cannot stop or reverse.

Change is hard, it hurts and it is healthy.  Change reminds us that we are not in control, that we are moving out of our comfort zone and it can lead to new and better circumstances.   In these changing times remember that God is our steady refuge, His love for us will never change and God's Word will never change.   God's plan for us also has NOT changed.

Change is all about stepping outside of our comfort zone and that means embracing a little pain along the way.

Most people are scared of the new, unknown and unfamiliar.  They prefer to stay in that womb of comfort.  When the going gets tough; when a little more effort is needed, when things get hard, they always pull back into safety.  But extraordinary people do the opposite.  They know they have to get out of the comfort zone and into new territory or they will become stagnate and die.

Change is uncomfortable. Sometimes it’s physically painful, but it is always mentally and emotionally painful, in the form of discipline, sacrifice, uncertainty and fear ……

Contrary to popular belief recent research reveals that people do not naturally resist change.   What people resist is the pain of the change.

In any life situation where loss and letting go are necessary, grieving inevitably has to take place for new bonding to be possible. 

In a world where change has become a way of life, successful change is dependent on one key condition - feeling secure.   This is one of the reasons many people stay in a job they dislike or in difficult relationships.   Even though things may be bad and they know change is necessary they are unwilling to take the step due to fear of the loss of their security base from where they feel safe and their needs are provided.

Perhaps you have realized that you are repeating similar experiences over and over again.  This means you have already created a habit that associates changes with pain and unhappiness.  Your unconscious mind is a very fast learner and if you have experienced unhappiness and pain once when things were changing in your life, it will happen over and over again until you stop the pattern.   Awareness of the repeated pattern helps you to recognize where you are at and what you really want in life.

Sadly, many believers desire godliness, but are spiritually crippled by habitual defensiveness to change.

It is a wise man who recognizes his human weakness and so welcomes any exposure of his sins.    That man will grow in wisdom, knowledge, and godliness.  

May all who read these posts have the grace to identify and forsake the defensive attitudes that could be used to avoid taking responsibility for change.

Listed below are some of our common defensive actions:

Rationalization helps us avoid taking full responsibility for something one has done by means of excuse and self-justification.   The seriousness of personal sin is down-played, so repentance is incomplete or non-existent.     Innocence requires NO defense.  Those with defiled consciences are often quick to defend themselves.

Avoidance means staying away from or leaving individuals who may confront them about their behavior, i.e.:  working late, missing counseling appointments, changing churches, walking out of conversations when conviction gets too great, etc.

“Those who walk in innocence
walk with confidence,
but those on crooked paths
will be found out.”    Prov. 10:9  CEB